This is a hard one. Most people are destroying their lives by living in the past. They are harboring all the wrongs that anyone has supposedly done to them in real or in imagination. Their lives are being worn out by thoughts of revenge and anger. What a waste.
Maybe there were wrongs committed. But haven’t we all committed wrongs to others? Haven’t we all done something that was not right to someone else, either knowingly or unknowingly? That is why the Bible is so strong on forgiveness. You must let go. You must let the past be buried and let the grass grow over the burial site. Forget it. Your anger will not change the one who did you the wrong. Your anger will only destroy you.
Do you have to live with someone who is hurting you deliberately? No. The Bible says to leave them. Have nothing to do with them if they do not want to repent and turn from their hurtful behavior. But don’t take the anger with you when you leave. You can forgive them in your heart; leave and start a new life. Don’t let their wicked, miserable life destroy yours. Let it go and begin a new life in Jesus. But do everything in your power to bring reconciliation between the two of you. That is of God.
Keeping score of wrongs is a miserable way to live. It brings no satisfaction. At the end of life, what will you have to look back upon: nothing of any value. On the other hand, if your life is dedicated to loving God and serving all mankind, you will have a life to look back upon that will bring you immense pleasure and pride. When walking through a rose garden, stop checking out the thorns and keep your eyes on the roses. Life will be a lot happier.
This brings up the next point, revenge. We all make mistakes. But are we to continue making a person suffer for their mistakes? We call ourselves “Christians” and then act in the most devilish ways against those we think have hurt or harmed us. We have no love, no forgiveness and no grace towards those we feel have betrayed or wronged us, or those we love. That is of the devil, not Jesus.
In Matthew 18:21-35, Jesus gives a parable about forgiveness. Simply put, a man owed the king ten thousand dollars and could not pay it. When the king put him and his wife and children up for sale to pay the debt, the man fell on his knees and begged. The king was moved and forgave him his debt. But when that man went out and saw a fellow servant who owed him one hundred dollars, he grabbed him by the neck and began choking him and demanded his money. The fellow servant fell on his knees and begged. But the servant had him thrown into jail until he paid the very last penny.
When the king heard of this, he sent for that wicked servant and said, “You wicked servant, I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?” Then he handed him over to the jailers to be tortured until he paid back all he owed.
The Bible says, “Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is Mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord. On the contrary: ‘If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12:19-21.
If you are the one taking out “God’s wrath” on your enemy, then God can’t do any more to punish that person. He now must punish you for your wickedness. Drop it. Leave it alone. Let go of your anger and wickedness against those you think are bad, evil or wicked. You are only making yourself like them, no matter how you justify yourself.
It is time to become like Jesus and to surrender to the Love of Jesus. Treat all men: the wicked, the evil, the derelict, the murderer, gays, the child molester and all those who are not of your caliber, with the same love and respect that you would want to be treated by Jesus. You may think you are better and that you deserve to be treated better by God. You’re not. In God’s eyes, you are worse off, since you don’t see your need.
That is why the Bible says, “I say to you that many will come from the east and the west, and will take their places at the feast with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven. But the subjects of the kingdom (those today who belong to a church and think they are Christians) will be thrown outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” Matthew 8:11, 12.
Understand? Those whom you, the state, the church, the “good” society think are bad, wicked, and “not up to par” will be the ones to feast in heaven. Those who think they belong there, the “subjects” of the kingdom, will be thrown outside. The weeping and gnashing of teeth won’t be by the “wicked” but by the “righteous” who thought they were going to be in heaven and are now finding themselves burning up. They will be weeping and gnashing their teeth.
Why? Because they did not forgive. They did not love. They thought they had the right to act “like God” according to their perverse understanding of God. They never studied the beauty of holiness, of forgiveness, of the loving kindness of God. Like Lucifer, they want the power of God to hate, hurt and bring vengeance, but they never learned to accept God’s meekness, love, kindness and forgiveness. We are to leave the “anger, hate, hurt and vengeance” we have of others to God. You are to practice the other attributes of Jesus if you want to get into heaven.
Yet look at all the “Christians” going to court against those they feel have hurt them or done them wrong. “Christians” who claim to believe the Bible refuse to listen to it or practice what it says. “But instead, one brother goes to law against another—and this in front of unbelievers! The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated? Instead, you yourselves cheat and do wrong, and you do this to your brothers.” 1 Corinthians 6:6-8.
“Like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be recovered, so we must die. But God does not take away life; instead, he devises ways so that a banished person may not remain estranged from him.” 2 Samuel 14:14.
Did you understand that text? That is our example. If you think someone has done wrong to you or your family, etc., then it is your duty to do all in your power to bring that person back into fellowship so he will “not remain estranged”. That is true Christianity. If you are not doing that for others, God can not do that for you, and you will spend eternity “estranged” from God. It is called everlasting death.
Please surrender your pride, hate, hurt and all sin and let the love of Jesus into your heart. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive. That is the only way we will be forgiven by God.